Badware

All the computer experts tell me I haven’t got a virus. That’s not shingles, they say, in defiance of my doctor, that’s Adware. That’s a relief, I think, except where am I going to get drugs from now? I quite like these heavy-dose anti-epileptics I got from the quack that fell me like a stunned…

Half full, half empty, who gives a shit?

iPad fixed. 15.10 hours. The third bloke only had to undo the work of the second bloke, in order to do the thing the first woman should have done at ten o’clock this morning. Another day in this short life gone. But the rest of the day is still half full. Wayhay! I’ll do the…

X Marks the Spot where I lost the Map

This is the continuing story of my technical difficulties, but I confess, I have made no effort to produce literary excellence this time. This is a straightforward blog rant. Hope you get the pleasure from it which I didn’t. I feel like my fingers have been taken away. I’m imagining phantom sensations, like I’m typing…

Snagged on the Wires

Who’s that you’re on the phone to? Sh! Willow. Willow? Willow the ISP. ISP. Service Provider. Trouble again? Hnf. Hello? Yes, I’m well, thanks. My name? Sure. Nicolson Brooks. Call me Nick. Telephone number? But I just keyed that in to get put through to you. Need it confirmed for security? Look this is the…

Fast

…..and that has been my life, said the sage to his sleeping students. When you awake, you will have missed lunch, and learned two important lessons. First the need to pay attention, and second, the value of brevity. And with that, he left the building to begin his fast.

Voices

I’m sitting on a rock at the bottom of the garden, in a hard frost, hearing voices, as you do, with my gloved hands cupped over my ears, trying to shut them out. Does no good, as it turns out, the voices are internal. Or so the medics say, nagging voices all of them, doctors…

Fresh Meat

Found this old photo and it made me curious. Made me think of places where you pick your lobster of choice from a tank of live specimens. What kind of restaurant specialises in both dog and mutton, and tethers them by the front door on a nice warm bed? Not vegan, at any rate. Must…

Today’s Muse

God was killing me. On a diet of fat mince. And sliced white bread. Doughy and wet. Wrapped in greaseproof paper. Stop it running away. Sterilised milk. Tasted of rice pudding. But didn’t go off till next day. If it didn’t get too hot. Furniture scavenged from derelict houses. Burnt-out or abandoned buildings. Fine old…

….life goes by, in red pyjamas

Toughened glass seemed to slide back on a cushion of air, into a hallway with the lights all dimmed. A reception desk rested in the shadows, an empty seat behind, and a ball-point pen with the cap off lay at an angle next to a pad of forms, half a cup of long-cold tea evaporated…

Not Kevin

She is descaling a moist piece of seabass into the kitchen sink with the back of a knife. It’s his favourite, blackened bass and fresh peas. She’s much calmer now. Subdued. Crammed to bursting with emptiness, and a slight blur at the edges of everything she sees. Stomach a little queasy, nervous. Her hands are…