Heading for the 13^th sun on my space bike, dodging asteroids in the dark. It is rush hour in the void, with not a soul to be seen, except through a telescope too large to fit in my panniers. I hit the solar boost, taking up the worst of the g-force in the lycra of my shorts, and fix a bearing on the first pit stop of my everlasting quest. The 13^th sun is near enough to be reachable over aeons as I journey towards the ends of the universe, which grow more distant with every passing second. Before you ask the question, the answer is ‘because it’s there’. I read that in an old mountaineering book before I set off, so I would have an excuse if I met anybody on the way.

Space is a funny place. It has no temperature, yet I am freezing all the time, no matter how hard I pedal, and the objects that fly by every few years create no turbulence, though I feel strangely attracted to them. I am beginning to run out of water, partly due to my limited carrying capacity, but I have not reached a stage of panic yet, as I have heard the reports that close to the 13^th sun a firm body orbits where milk and honey are plentiful and all life forms are welcome, even discredited humanoids. It is going to be all right. On the planet called God. And if I can’t find it there, basking in the warm glow of the 13^th sun, then I will continue my journey, to the ends of the universe, if need be, if I can catch up with them, because paradise must be out there somewhere, surely. It is written in the scriptures.

You might ask why bother with the search, if I begin it with the certainty of finding it already fixed, and to that I say, ‘I am an explorer seeking proof for the unbelievers. My faith alone will lead me, and by association, them, to the answers.’

I have just passed the 5^th sun, and my solar capture is weakened. The receptor is jammed facing forwards at the tiny pin-point in the dark that is the 6^th sun, so I have slowed down considerably. On a positive note, the extra effort demanded by the hard pedalling in the absence of auxiliary power has warmed me up, and although I am now sweating in my skin-shorts, I am being cooled by the thawing icicles in my beard, and my fingers have loosened enough to help with steering and allow me to change to a less energy-sapping gear ratio. It is all going well, although my next fixed point is not getting perceptibly larger in my viewfinders, when suddenly I run over a space nail and am brought to an unscheduled halt by a puncture at an uncharted spot in the void. While awaiting the arrival of the breakdown service, I have ample time to compute and register my co-ordinates for future travellers, although I will not be able to log them till I recover battery power at my next staging post, which is winking seductively at me up ahead, light years away in the shadows.

I am not going to let this worry me, though. My faith won’t allow it. I am doing this for all of us, and one day you will thank me for it, even if I am long dead before I get there. Like all my readers.

I reach for my hip flask…